Although she is very busy handling tons of patients in her successful practice, she often works on me herself. If she's not there because she is sick from chemo, she leaves detailed instructions for my appointments with her assistants. Recently I was there for a....visit...check-up... adjustment... what do you call it when they change the wires and put more sharp stuff in your mouth??? Anyway, she comes in and yells to her assistant to bring her this and that then looks at me and says......
"did you take something before you came?"
"have you already eaten?"
"i'm going to wire your teeth together"
"i need your teeth to settle into the bone this way"
"it's part of the end of your treatment, i have to do this"
"you are going to have pain, major pain"
"april, i'm so sorry"
"you are going to hurt like you've never hurt before"
"i'm going to be thinking about you tonight"
"don't hate me"
"keep tylenol in your purse"
I'm not exaggerating. She said all that. I'm sitting in the chair, speechless, just staring at her with big owl eyes. Then she and her assistant work together, winding twisted wire around the bracket of one tooth, pulling it over and wrapping around it the bracket of the neighboring tooth, and then twisting my teeth together until they are in the position she wanted them in. Since my teeth are so loose right now, she could actually get them to move this way while I was in the chair.
I crawled out of her office that day, whimpering, but thinking about what she said. "This is going to hurt but it needs to happen in order to get the good result we want. There will be pain but it's for a good reason and it will be worth it". Wouldn't it be helpful if we could get this kind of warning in life? If we had this advance knowledge, would we be less blind-sided when trouble comes? Would it be nice if God gave us a disclaimer like that before pain entered our lives? He did.
"Dear brothers and sisters, whenever trouble comes your way, let it be an opportunity for joy. When your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be strong in character and ready for anything."
James 1
I asked my pastor about that word "tested". He said there are two kinds of testing. One is the testing from the devil to destroy our lives. The other is testing from God, which in this verse translates into "approve". James is talking about trials that God lets us go through in order to bring about a successful end. There are sometimes painful journeys for us to take, but it's because it has to happen that way in order to bring us into a blessed new place. Most people do not change unless it A) costs too much or B) hurts too much (PAE). Pain is a wonderful motivator for change.
I'm sure there are plenty of folks who grew up in their faith trusting God's love and feeling safe and confident in His plan. Then there are those like me who have to dispel the lie that God brings pain into my life in order to hurt me, to punish me for making wrong choices, to see how I handle defeat, to measure my level of strength, to watch me squirm. With the belief system that "everyone who loves me hurts me", it was so easy to think God was the same way.
The more I trust God with the most tender, vulnerable parts of myself, the more I am unlearning the misrepresentation of His love. I now believe that any pain He allows in my life is because it is necessary to bring me into victory. God does not plan defeat for us, even when He allows us to hurt a bit. God is a loving Father and the only One who loves us with holy, pure, agape love. It is not His character to set us up or knock us down just to cause us pain. The wires don't stay on our teeth forever. Freedom from sharp stuff in a tender place is the plan. The soreness and pain are temporary. A beautiful smile is on the way.
