Rejection. Ouch, it hurts just reading the word. It's a common issue, something we all experience. Some of us are just learning the sting of it, others of us have endured more than our fair share. It's painful. It sucks. It hits us out of the blue, bringing confusion and heartache. But Jesus says....it's normal.
I would have to put myself in the category of those who have endured more than our fair share of rejection. I've experienced it in my closest relationships from people who were supposed to love me. Parents. Siblings. Husband. Pastors. Friends. The most painful and difficult rejection was when I was rejected for no apparent reason. Literally, I did nothing wrong. Which means I did everything right. So, when rejection hit, there was no way for me to fix it. There was nothing for me to fix because I hadn't done anything to break it. My hands were tied. The relationship was hijacked by the other person and all I could do was grieve and find a way to accept it. If there had been an obvious problem that could be addressed, maybe I'd stand a chance at attempting reconciliation. But with no reason or communication, I had no choice but to deal with "I no longer want you".
If you know and understand how this feels let me assure you that you are not alone. I can relate to your frustration. I know the feeling of injustice when we are forced to deal with consequences that result from someone else's actions. Better than me, however, you are in Good Company. Jesus himself was rejected by the very people He came to save. Was He rejected by His generation because He did something wrong? NO. Was He somehow at fault? NO. Was His love returned to him with a "no, thanks" for no valid reason? YES. If it can happen to the Son of God, my darlings, it is gonna happen to us.
If someone rejects my love, my default reaction is to think it's me. That I did something wrong. My heart immediately searches for guilt. There are times though that there is simply no explanation. My forty-two years on this earth have taught me that people can be catty and weird and insecure and selfish and mean and unfair. I have to force myself to consider this when I am standing alone watching someone walk out of my life when I really want them to stay.
The next time you find yourself in this painful place, and you know that you have clean hands and a pure heart, let me encourage you to celebrate the fact that you are being made a little more like Christ. He understands. He knows the sting. He has comfort for you. Don't doubt yourself. Stand strong. Keep your head up. Turn it to God and ask Him to validate you. Don't let your confidence walk out the door with whoever is rejecting you. These things happen and there can be nothing wrong with your heart. A treasure that can be found in a dark place like this is that in spite of the pain of rejection without reason, you can still forgive and keep loving. Keep doing right. Just because someone does the wrong thing does not mean you have to stop doing right thing. Throw a party for yourself and celebrate your tender heart. Turn the broken relationship over to the Healer. Ask God to restore. He can fill voids of rejection in such awesome, creative ways. Try to consider that there can be all kinds of reasons that people reject us, that have nothing to do with us. Like maybe they don't understand us or don't know what to do with us. Or maybe they are just rejecting God in us. Perhaps immaturity is reigning. Or maybe the timing was just wrong.
You are never ever alone. Humans may leave but God never will. If you feel like you have been deserted for carrying the banner of righteousness, lean back into the strong arms of the cornerstone that was rejected. Feel His hand on yours, lending you strength, holding that banner with you, knowing just how you feel.
"For I have come to you in my Father’s name, and you have rejected me."
John 5:43
"I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world."
John 16:33
No comments:
Post a Comment