Forgiveness

The hardest thing for me to forgive is injustice. To experience being abused or taken advantage of causes me to turn from a peaceful flower to a raging lion! I struggle with releasing someone from spiteful behavior, whether toward me or toward someone I love. My flesh wants to hang onto anger and unforgiveness, thinking that if I let go, I'm saying that what happened is okay. I have to remind myself that letting someone off my hook in no way lets them off God's hook and He will take care of the judgement. That can be a struggle, too! David said in Psalm 73 "Was it for nothing that I kept my heart pure? I tried to understand why the wicked prosper, but what a difficult task it is!" I've had to come to terms with the reality that seeing justice this side of heaven is rare. We have to trust that God is dealing with the experiences that we lay at the cross. In heaven we will have all the answers. Recently God called me to forgive a friend's abuse. It was the last thing my flesh wanted to do, but here were my incentives:

1. Unforgiveness traps my heart. I can't afford that. I need to live from my heart. When I am angry and bitter, I am not pure before God. My heart is not tender and open before him because I've basically given it over to the enemy. No one has the ability to cause me to sin against God by holding offense. There's a funny movie titled "Raising Arizona", about an infertile couple who kidnap a baby. The baby is taken from them by a rough biker dude hired by the parents. When the woman realizes her stolen baby is now in the hands of this maniac, she storms down the middle of the street toward his motorcylce with my favorite line from the movie, "Gimme back that baby you warthog from hell!". A funny analogy, but we need that same determination and authority, to take back what we have surrendered and what rightfully belongs to us.

2. God's love conquers the sin of unforgiveness. After releasing my friend from the abuse, I realized I still had love for them. It wasn't my love, it was God's love. Romans 5:5 says God has filled our hearts with His love. A good thing because we need it to do what he requires us to do! God never calls us to do something that He doesn't equip us to do.

3. Unforgiveness takes our focus off of God. I heard a teaching on anger that said that being angry at someone is idolatry, because we are endowing them with more authority than God. It said anger means you aren't trusting God with your life, and if anger directs our life it's a curse. If I have a stronghold of anger in my life, that's where my thoughts are going to be....replaying the injustice, validating myself in my mind, etc. With all that going on, God isn't getting my time or focus. Realizing that intimacy with my Lord was being compromised helped me to overcome the unforgiveness. No relationship on earth is more important than my relationship with my King.

If you have the same challenge before you, I hope this encourages you, even in a small way. Doing the right thing when someone else does the wrong thing can be a real struggle. I can tell you that as a result of my obedience, my heart is more free, my mind is at peace, and the painful words and memories have been replaced with sweet ones. I now think of this person with a different perspective because God changed it. I take away the jewels and leave behind the pain.